Monday, September 25, 2006

Finding New Things

When is it okay to hold on to something you miss, when in other cases, the same feelings are considered pathetic? Why are songs of loss so touching and noble when we listen to them, but in practicality, unhealthy or, at worse, delusional? Better yet, what is the difference between romance and obsession? I suppose that is mutual-ism, though it could be argued differently, I'm sure. It is irksome sometimes that there aren't any more words than "Love" in English to describe the concept, while in some languages there are so many. I guess at some point it became advantageous to be unspecific.

It is painful sometimes to note that things endearing to us or important to us may change, relocate, or disappear, and in those cases, when our treasures as they were have been irrevocably removed, it must be best to somehow find another thing, or facet of things, that we can love too, because, unfortunately, the treasures that capture us so dearly tend to be singularly and tragically unique--unmistakable and irreplaceable to very root of the word.

Forgive me, because I do not mean to suggest that it is impossible or dreary to seek after different things to love, nor the same about keeping an thimble's full of hope that whatever it was that left may, in some form, one day return. In fact, it can be a healing and gratifying experience to remember how the light would shine upon it or how differently the air would smell around it or in what season it was most enjoyed, but there are other things, too.

In the end, it may be what reaches us first that determines which great thing in this universe we will miss the most. Prejudices forms so quickly... That may be unfair, but then, circumstances--or so I have found--rarely have any consideration for fairness unless they are guided. What guides them? People, sometimes, but other than that I do not suppose to know, nor do I know for sure that there is anything explicitly meant for each of us, which is both assuring and damning. On the one hand, if we find something that fits and lose it or fail to gain it then there may be something else out there that can be made to fit just as well; but on the other hand, the entire ordeal may be shoving an assortment of square pegs through a round hole. I doubt that last part, though, since I think there are just too many beautiful things.